DISCLAIMER: (R-10) Some words and expressions may be too graphic, too flagrant and not too suitable for young and innocent readers. Parental Guidance is recommended. :p
Everything was sudden.
Yesterday, as I was assisting my nephew's school teachers in operating the sound system, an unknown somewhat alien-like number appeared on my phone's screen attempting to call me. I panicked and thought I need to answer it. I ran quickly to the school's backyard awaaay from the playground area, where the two auditorium-like speakers were busting the eardrums of the parents and their children in the other side while celebrating the Graduation and Recognition ceremonies of the school and listening to the latest rendition of "I believe I can Fly" and "Next in Line".
Lo and behold. It was the HR recruitment officer of Metrobank. I panicked more. She was dictating things I should do for my pre-employment documentations, and I HAD NO PEN AND PAPER IN HAND. So I nicely asked if she could hold one minute for me to get a pen and paper, but she sternly responed, "BAKIT?". Mataray. :| But she was calm throughout the conversation.
"Don, tomorrow, March 26, proceed to Manila Doctors Hospital in UN Ave., Ermita for your medical exam at 8am. Look for Vans." (I'd like to talk about all the other things she said, but it maybe for the next blog.)
It crashed my schedule. I was supposed to go to school this morning for the Stations of the Cross. (I'm sorry Yvette. I heard you were the only one playing guitar for the entire 2 hours 0.O )
Then today came. I woke up at 4am, but I snoozed. I got up at 4:40am. I said, "Oh shit! I need to catch the 5am bus!" Oh well. Shit happens. I fixed myself up, and Dad took me to the bus stop around 5:15am. I was able to catch the 5am bus which was delayed. Thank God.
The trip was fast. Hell fast. The driver was crazy! He saw a truck, sinabayan nya. Then a Pajero was speeding by his left, pinatulan at kinarera. I don't know what's wrong with that bus driver, but he was challenging every speeding critter along the road at 130 km/h. :| I bet if he had a chance, he'd even have fun on making roadkills. The bus left Tanauan around 5:30am, I was in Buendia Taft LRT at 6:15 am. Total of 45 minutes including stops for supervisor inspections and the frequent load and unload procedures. :| Bad-Ass-Punk driver.
Aaaanyywaaay, I stopped by DLSU around 6:30 to visit the MBS chapel (praying that nothing wrong would happen at my medical exams), and to check if somebody was around to say hi to. There were none, so I went to UN avenue. I said to myself, "I'm gonna eat somewhere cheap, and somewhere fulfilling." I had Chowking in mind. I arrived in UN ave. McDonald's was full. Jollibee was worse. Chowking was closed o.O. KFC was closed. Chicken Inasal was closed. No other food stalls were open, except for one - the-ever-so-cheap-and-fulfilling-and-satisfying Pancake House (notice the sarcasm). I had no choice. I walked in Pancake House, and spent the breakfast there and waited for 8am to come.
Here it comes.
7:45am
I was already by the medical exam office where I should be. I was kinda happy, because I was first in line, and NO ONE ELSE was there. I asked the guy for Vans, that I was from Metrobank. He said, "8am pa kami magbukas, ipaphotocopy mo muna ID mo tapos balik ka dito."
So I, being a very obedient kid, went to look for a photocopy station. I found one under the LRT. "Yeah!", I said, "It's open!".
8:00am
I headed back quickly to catch the opening of the office. I was there exactly at 8am, and shocking as it may seems, I asked the guard for a number, and I was number 9. o.O Darn it. If I was number 9, I'd be delayed further since each patient would be checked while the others wait one by one. I felt competition was there. "I SHOULD BE FIRST IN LINE!" I was kinda having trouble with being at the end of the line since I was catching time for my other schedules for the day.
8:38am
I was entertained, finally, by the reception nurse. She gave me three sheets of paper, and asked me to go have my X-Ray done first. Alright, I went.
8:40am
I arrived at the radiology section and 3 guys and 2 girls were ahead of me. As I sat down, the first 2 guys got their x-rays already and went off. Shucks. Then, miraculously, the nurse called in the guys first. YEEAAAAHHH! 2 down, three to go! We did the x-ray. After a while, the nurse called out, "Hernandez, you're good to go, head for the laboratory. Samuel (not his real name), ulit tayo ng x-ray mo." YAAAAHOOOO! another 1 down, and those 2 to go!
8:50am
I was by the laboratory medicine section of the hospital, and I was wondering why those two guys ahead of me were waiting outside the restroom with two plastic canisters. I went inside the lab reception. The receptionist said, "May urine and stool samples na?" "Wala pa po." "Okay, maglagay ka dito sa dalawang plastic ng tig-isang sample, kalahating canister ng urine, and pea-sized stool. Ibigay mo sakin within the hour." "Okay po."
Now that explains the two guys waiting outside the restroom, by the fountain with two empty canisters in hand. They were waiting for the angel of poo and pee to come dawn. :)) Luckily, since I left Tanauan early and on a rush, I wasn't able to do my restroom session. I went inside, and took the samples quickly. Wehe. :))
VICTORY. I am now first in line! bwahahahahaha
9:00am
I gave my samples to the receptionist, and I was refered for blood extraction. It was fast and alright. I was at the top of my happiness when the guy said, "Sir, inom ka madami tubig." "Bakit? Nagbigay nako urine sample diba?" "Ah, sir, iba po yun. Kelangan ulit urine sample para sa Drug Test."
NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! I gave everything on that last pee! :((
I drank about 4 glasses of water, and a glass of iced tea. I walked around so that it would go down. But to no avail. :(( I was afraid to try at once since I need to fill up the entire plastic bottle. If not, it'd be thrown away and I have to start all over again.
(Luckily, nobody expected another urine sample was needed, so I was still first. mwehehehe)
9:45am
After 45 minutes of waiting, I had to try. So I tried. I entered the restroom with another guy nurse. Yes, at a drug test, you'd have to be supervised while you pee to make sure it's purely pee. :)) Imagine the agony of being hesitant and uncomfortable of somebody watching you. Shet. But I had to try. It was done. Glory!! I filled up the bottle, and I was done with the Drug Test. hahahaha
9:50am
I was back at the first office I was in this morning. It was time for my physical exam. The nurse led me to a room, checked my vital stats and my vision. Then, after a few minutes, she called me again. I was to enter the doctor's cubicle.
I was kinda expecting something about being checked entirely, but still, I felt it was a bit scandalous. hahahahaha
at the guy doctor's cubicle: he said (and i followed everything) " take off your shirt... sit on the bed... inhale, exhale... okay, face the door, drop your pants and underwear... TUWAD. hold your a** cheeks and open it... now face here... IRE.... okay, dress up and you're okay."
SCANDALOUS.
enough said, and let's move on. :))
10:30am
It was the final leg of the medical exam, and I was still first. :)) Dental Check-Up. :)) This took up most of my time since I failed the exam. :)) They said that if I should be employed, I should have 8 old tooth fillings replaced. Yikes. I was first hesitant, but everything was in rush. I can't wait for my real dentist to fix my teeth in Batangas. I had to take it, even if it cost me P400.00 per filling. Oh well. I gave in. There was about 15 minutes of discussion, and the Dentist went out to pee, for an amazing 25minutes. Whaaa?
Then he came back. In fairness, the dentist was quick. All 8 fillings was done around 12:15noon time. At least, it was done by lunch time.
I was happy since I was done, and I could go back to Lipa, even if a little bit delayed to do other stuff.
It was a very interesting adventure this morning. :)) Believe me. Put yourself in my shoes. :))
By the way, I still ended up being first in line after the dental fix, since there was only ONE DENTIST available for all the medical exam patients. Lucky me. :))
Till next time! >:D<
